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these are drafts written since 2007 that never made it to actual posts. i have certainly grown since writing these thoughts but felt that, in sharing them, i could also re-live these moments and see myself just how far i've come from the person i used to be. all are unedited and posted as they were first written.



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pain
Friday, December 19, 2014

​When I talk about the pain that was inflicted upon me, I am not looking for sympathy or pity.  I'm not exhibiting the all eyes on me syndrome.  I'm educating.  And by doing so, I'm adding more distance between me and the pain.  For a very long time, I believed that if you don't acknowledge something, it just eventually goes away.  But that has never worked.  The more I talk about being hurt, the better I feel about not living the same scenarios over and over again.  It's almost like an out of body experience because none of that defines who I am today.  It impacted me, yes, but it didn't define me.  I think the more talk there is about abuse, the more educated people become.  That's why I don't mind telling my stories, even though, some are still pretty painful to recall.  If I can just bring awareness to other people in order to help them look for the signs that this could be taking place with a child they know, it might help them to encourage that child that it's okay to speak up.

(07-21-2013)

 



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